Frequently Asked Questions
A: Somatic sex education is a trauma-informed, client lead, somatic based practice where I create and hold a container that is safe enough for people to uncover and work on sexual blocks. It is a holistic approach that offers insights into new perspectives on sexuality and eroticism.
This work can include things like guided somatic (or body-based) practices, consent education, genital de-armoring, anatomy and pelvic floor mapping, pleasure awareness, breathwork techniques, mindfulness and more.
At it’s core I like to say that this practice is all about really slowing down to listen to what your body has to say and then learning how to communicate it to others. It’s a simple but not easy practice, especially when we start deconstructing the art of giving and receiving with another person. I use the Wheel of Consent by Dr Betty Martin as one of the foundations for this practice. I also use tools and frameworks such as the Window of Tolerance, Polyvagal Theory, Attachment Theory, and co and self-regulation strategies.
A: I currently only work with clients online and occasionally when I'm in the San Francisco Bay Area.
A: I like to start by having a conversation with the client about what is bringing them here and let them get comfortable in the space and with me. We can review the intake form if necessary as well. If it’s wanted, I often lead some breathwork and visualization exercises to downregulate the nervous system. I have a set of tools that I use to set up the container for effective continued education and learning together. After that we figure out what would feel best for the client and how I can support them on their journey in this session and beyond.
A: Somatic Sex Education is an unlicensed profession, like reiki practitioners, midwives, acupuncturists and massage therapists (in some states).
There are 2 professional regulatory associations and a code of ethics for Somatic Sex Educators to follow. Students and graduates of The Institute for the Study of Somatic Sex Education (ISSSE) have ongoing professional education and mentorship support.
A: All of your personal information, anything that you share with me, and that you saw me, is held in confidence. I am not subject to mandatory reporting laws. I prioritize your privacy and confidentiality.
As for the boundaries of the container, in this practice, we will work together to find a way to address any issues around your sexuality together. There are some somatic based exercises that can involve (if you chose) consensual, one-way, non goal-oriented touch to demonstrate giving and receiving dynamics. I only offer one-way touch if there is any bodywork or massage - I do not expect or want clients to touch me. All touch that I provide will be to further the education and self-development of the client. This is a provider/client relationship and professional standards are maintained. I happy to refer to people to other practitioners for any reason.
A: I'd be delighted to have a conversation with your partner and include them in this process. My aim is to provide both of you with a common language to address any challenges that arise, strengthening your unity. By helping you become a more confident, centered, and contented version of yourself, your partner will also reap the rewards. This self-improvement journey is vital for both your relationship's success and individual empowerment.
If you’re still unsure of how to talk with your partner about this, here’s an example conversation starter:
“I’d like to seek professional guidance for ______ and I wanted to be open about it with you. Our intimacy is important to me and I believe this will help us have a more fulfilling relationship and cultivate a stronger bond between us.”
My work as a practitioner is to bring you closer to your partner and for you to have a better understanding of yourself.
A: Yes, I have training in trauma-informed care and I don't specialize exclusively in trauma. Depending on your specific needs, I might recommend referring you to a specialized trauma expert if your needs are outside of my scope. My primary focus is on ensuring that I can genuinely assist you in your healing journey. Your well-being is my top priority, regardless of who you decide to work with.
A: Please provide 24 hours notice for cancellations or you will be billed for the session. Emergencies are exceptions. If you are sick, please let me know and we can reschedule with no additional charge.
A: Yes, I offer a free 30 minute consultation to see if it’s a good fit for us both. You don’t need to know where you’re going. I have a plethora of tools we can use to help you discover what might be beneficial for your development.
A: Absolutely! I will work with you with where you are right now. You are always in control of what happens during a session together. I have many talk-based activities that incorporate somatic elements and mindfulness. Staying within your window of tolerance is an important aspect of this learning.
A: The time we spend together is a container for your erotic learning. I may or may not, at certain points, become aroused in our session together and it will not impact my actions in how I hold the container. If I believe my arousal is getting in the way of my ability to hold space for you, I will chose to not work together in order to maintain my own integrity and professional standards.
